05
Jan
2018

Latest drug trend baffles police

Posted by Bob Sayther

Doctors have discovered truth to the adage, "pooping your brains out." 11 year old Hugh Jelog from Dust, Iowa was rushed to the emergency room after drinking two full bottles of Kaopectate. His mother reported hearing screams and crying for 2 hours before investigating. She found her son standing by the toilet with blood everywhere. 

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05
Jan
2018

Study About Cats Expose Double Standard

Posted by Peter Christofferson
Cats
Cats

A study performed by SPWC revealed that woman have been holding a double standard between men and cats for decades. The study shows that cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep. The study also showed that men  are independent, they don't listen well, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.

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04
Jan
2018

Climate Change a Hoax?

Posted by Bob Sayther

Climate change is a topic that is sensitive to the entire globe. Nations have implemented several measures to help slow the change of the climate and to keep the world how it is now. The United Nations even created a global pact called the Paris Agreement that has set the standard for all countries to pay the U.N. to keep the climate at bay and the temperature down. Some groups say climate change is fake. Others fight and say it isn't. This has been the topic for arguments and debates for years. The world finally has an answer.

 

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04
Jan
2018

Florida Under Marshall Law

Posted by Peter Christofferson

The state of Florida is under Marshall Law after snow storm, all the borders have been closed, a curfew of 6:00pm has been issued and no travel except for government and emergency vehicles only. We were sent a single photo by Ivana Thicone from Happy, Florida with a caption that read, "Border is shut, they stopped all of us from crossing and blew up that car!". We have reached out to all of our resources but it seems the internet is down and the only communication coming from Florida are on small transistor radios. We will continue to follow this story and keep you updated.

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03
Jan
2018

Local Fecal Artist Going Global

Posted by Peter Christofferson

Local artist Fekal Mather has been creating his fecal art for decades and has now been accepted to put his art on display for six months at The International Art Museum. His artwork has caused many to turn there heads for years considering the material he uses, human feces. Most of the time the feces is his own but he does use donations as well from clean, vegan people, he says the consistency is far greater with a vegan. It takes Fekal 3 to 4 weeks to complete one of his artworks depending on the level of difficulty of the piece.

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03
Jan
2018

Rare Event Flash Freezes Fish In Alcova

Posted by Peter Christofferson

An intense blast of artic air coming in the form of seventy five mile an hour wind, dropped the temperature in one of the bays down to -74.3° in a matter of seconds, causing the already near freezing open water in an unnamed bay at Alcova Lake, to freeze almost instantly, trapping thousands of newly released fingering trout in the ice and one walleye that was jumping out of the water to more than likely escape the extreme temperature drop. The flash freezing event is very rare and has only happened one other time in recorded history. 

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03
Jan
2018

New Discovery Will Change History

Posted by Peter Christofferson

A huge and startling discovery has been made at the Devils Tower in Wyoming. Scientists from the Wyoming State Parks Department were conducting photographic seismic readings below the tower, when they discovered an incredibly large petrified root system below the tower. The parks department released a statement saying, "We have discovered, what looks like a giant root system stemming from the base of The Devils Tower. The root system has been measured at 4 miles deep by 7 miles wide.

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03
Jan
2018

Wolf Shot In Watford City

Posted by Peter Christofferson

A large wolf was shot by a farmer west of Watford City on her property. Linda said, “I have had a few cats go missing and noticed some unusual deer kills on my property the last few weeks, then I started seeing very large dog tracks. As I was coming down my driveway last night this massive wolf came out onto the dirt road, I locked up my truck, loaded my pistol and unloaded until it was empty. I ended up shooting it six times in the back legs and tracked it down within an hour where I put it out of its pain.

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03
Jan
2018

Newest Trend Is Already Hitting Missoula

Posted by Bob Sayther

Missoula is well known for setting trends, such as dressing like homeless people. That trend has hit such a high that the actual poor people and homeless can not find proper clothes due to hipsters raiding thrift stores so they can capture the look of being poor. This newest trend is definitely going to make waves in the, “Trend City”, it’s called, “Garbage”, The person digs through garbage cans and wears trash, showing not only the look of being poor, but with the added benefit of looking the most poor, unique and special.

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