President, Thomas S. Monson, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, better known as Mormons, recently passed on January 2nd, 2018 at the age of 90 years old. This has prompted the Mormons to select a new president, which has also resulted in a shift of the first counselor, and second counselor. The 17th president of the LDS church is now Russell M. Nelson (top picture), a former surgeon.
The Natrona County School District announces they are removing points from all sports to promote equality within sports stating, “Everyone is a winner and everyone should be able to feel like a winner, so all sports events will be just timed and no scores will be kept. This will open the door for others to join sports that don’t meet the physical requirements.”. The new era of sports has arrived.
Sources are telling us that O’ Dannell was found dead in a Nevada Desert Wednesday morning. #meetoo
Harry Gashe of Evansville decided to turn the street in front of his house into a literal, “Shit Hole” after watching the news break about Trumps supposed remarks towards other countries. Harry was spotted in his front yard at 2:00p.m. Grabbing his feces from his own butthole and Throwing his own feces into the street screaming, “You want to see a shit hole!?!, here’s a shit hole from my shithole!!”. When police arrived he was covered from head to toe in his own nutty delight, nude doing cartwheels.
The popular tv show Touched By An Angel is being ripped from the air waves after Antifa said that the title implies being inappropriately touched by angels and promotes rape culture. Stores and online sources are pulling all copies and dvds from their shelves due to this latest movement on preventing rape culture from being a thing. No networks have reached out in fear of retaliation for saying the wrong thing and offending someone.
Oreo is welcoming a new cookie that will be hitting shelves in a reservation near you. “We plan on stocking the shelves in higher traffic areas with meth use”
The recent Me Too movement and endless sexual harassment claims have created a negative impact for this positive movement. The latest sexual harassment and wage equality fad that has hit the world is now starting to take notice of the negative results of such a huge movement and those results are not good. Since the feminist, antimen and me too movement has begun, woman in the workplace numbers have dropped 27% due to businesses being afraid of a lawsuit, wages have also dropped by 10% due to the same reason.
The latest body modification trend sweeping the nation applauded by world renowned sex therapist; Dr Ruth Westheimen.
Dr Ruth, pictured, has been a vocal advocate for allowing girls as young as 18 to rush to their local tattoo shops, planned parenthood clinic or mosque and have the female circumcision performed. Only then can they finally have access to the health and sexual pleasure benefits American and Semitic boys around the globe have enjoyed since Abraham became the father of two peoples.
President Trump is in the spot like again after a Big named rap artist Meek Mill painted a picture of him covering Trumps mouth in an attempted “death” plot. Trump said he’s upped Security and banned all of Mills garbage music to be pulled off the airwaves. #itneedstostop
ACME APPLIANCE GRAND OPENING SALE!!!
Acme Appliance, America’s leader in industrial home appliances and surplus Navy anchors is pleased to announce the opening of it’s newest location in downtown Kit Carson Colorado!
Come down and see our large selection of ranges, refrigerators and dishwasher dressing!
Buy your appliances as a set and save! Be sure to check out our line of white and off white ranges and refrigerators that match all of our dishwashers!