John Wayne Bobbits Penis Escaped!
Lorena Bobbit reported the escaped member to Manassas police this afternoon, reporting that the moving member left a note telling her they were through and it was moving west!
“Jumbo” (pictured) was reportedly named such by the Long Island Lolita herself. A name Lorena became fond of after she separated Jumbo from JW’s care.
Lorena is very worried and Manassas police are offering a reward for the return of the wayward junk.